Other/Mixed Training for 14 year old girl

[guardian7]

The consensus these days is that resistance training is beneficial for kids and teenagers as long as it is not too heavy and with higher reps.

How would I go about training my 14 year old daughter who is not athletic and has had a recent history of sedentary activity due to some health issues related to her bones (nothing that would affect training). We live in Asia with long hours of study normal even in middle school.

I have bought her a health club membership where I go to work out. It is a local one that lets me keep my kettlebells there : ).

She finally recognizes the need and shows willingness to exercise, which is key. Her doctor encourages it but urges caution and a slow start. She is at a healthy weight but lacking muscle.

The emphasis would be lower body.

What kind of minimal three day a week program would you start with? Would you introduce machines for upper body strength?

Bodyweight squats and goblet squat
One leg deadlift
KB deadlift
Light dumbbell upper body circuit or machine circuit
Inverted row (EDIT).
Hip bridges
Plank pushup holds
Hanging from the pullup bar
Treadmill when the weather gets cold.

Principles
Introduce GTG with bodyweight squats before dinner etc.
Tension with pushup hold and maybe some fun balance activities.

Keep in mind that she is a beginner and not strong. Apart from swimming, no history of athletic ability. It is much less common for girls in Asia.

I was also thinking dance for cardio. Building her own dance based footwork routine or something to make it more interesting for her.

I would like to teach some StrongFirst principles through exercise like tension and relaxation, feed forward tension etc. as well.

 

[lais817]

If she's into dance, that could be the only thing she needs to get started. Will build plenty of leg and core strength, and if she actually enjoys doing it, then consistency won't be an issue. Is there any dance studios around you who she could do a trial at?

Once she has built a foundation you could introduce an easy strength style routine, emphasising and explaining Strongfirst principles.

 

[guardian7]

If she's into dance, that could be the only thing she needs to get started. Will build plenty of leg and core strength, and if she actually enjoys doing it, then consistency won't be an issue. Is there any dance studios around you who she could do a trial at?

Once she has built a foundation you could introduce an easy strength style routine, emphasising and explaining Strongfirst principles.

She definitely needs a strength training regime and we have a health club in the same building. She lacks strength. StrongFirst!

 

[lais817]

She definitely needs a strength training regime and we have a health club in the same building. She lacks strength. StrongFirst!

Fair enough, my suggestion for dance first was that the only 8yo girls (my daughter's age) who can do legit pushups or demonstrate much strength are dancers.

The biggest part of getting her strong is finding something she enjoys and will continue to do.

I think you are on a winner with goblet squats and KB deads, keep it simple. Have her keep a log so she can see progress.

 

[LukeV]

She definitely needs a strength training regime and we have a health club in the same building. She lacks strength. StrongFirst!

Hmmmm most 14yo who "lack strength" need activity, not training. For some of us going to a gym in our teens has been the beginning of a lifelong passion but for others it's a complete turn off. Dance, gymnastics, sports, yoga, pilates etc are all perfectly valid ways to be strong - it's called getting fit. I would encourage you to think a bit more broadly about the goal and explore with her all the options to achieve it

 

[lais817]

Not sure if others will think if it's related or not, but this article comes to mind - When StrongFirst Meets Circus: How Plan Strong Helped Us Win Silver in Moscow | StrongFirst

Shows how Strongfirst principles apply to more than just traditional strength training. It probably doesn't "help you" for your specific issue re programming, but might encourage you to think about other options in a different light.

Training family is hard. I've struggled immensely with it, and usually end up putting my wife off doing it with my over eagerness. Good luck mate

 

[Xene]

I don‘t have a solution or program for you, but I would like to share my experience training with kids.

I train with my son who is 7 years old and last summer I trained a boy from the neighborhood who was then 15.

What I do/did with the boys is/was mostly circle training, a high variety of movements mixed with balance drills. I think you don‘t have to bring her to the gym if she doesn‘t really want this. I try to lead by example and I can do this because of I train at home. Whenever I start to train I ask my son if he wants to join me. If not, okey, if yes, great. The voluntariness is one of the most important fact for training with kids in my opinion. My son swims, trains Judo and is in our local gymnastics club (mostly playing games there). They play sports 3 times per week at school as well. So movement, training, playing is something he experiences every day. When we do our strength and conditioning training additionally we try to have fun.

I have a Torque M1 sled and we start every training with pulling and pushing the sled for about 15 to 20 minutes. Between this we do push ups, plank holds or quick sprints (agility work). We keep on moving and vary the speed of the sledpulls/pushes. The final pushes are used for all out sprints with resistance. (During this time my daughter (4yo) sits on the sled and is encouraging us)
Then we do some strength work with bodyweight, TRX, on the floor. We do TRX rows, more push ups, planks, dead bugs, tibial raises, calf raises, standing on one leg, etc. All done in circuits. We keep on moving, joking around, trying to beat each other in planks, crawl through our garden. At this moment I still don‘t use kettlebells or any iron-weight at all. Sometimes we do hill sprints, I carry a kettlebell and he has to beat me. Most of the time children from the neighborhood join us. Those are my variety days. When I do my A+A/Q&D work, he can watch me or I give hime something else to do. But those sessions need my full focus and I mostly do them alone.

Yesterday we only had a short time window and he did:
- 15 minutes: 25m pull, 25m push, 7 push ups (while he did push ups I did my sled rounds)
- Pull ups: 1, 2, 1, 1, 1
- Tib raises: 15/2
- Standing on 1 leg: several times for about 30 sec
- TRX rows: 15/2
- Different planks for about 2 minutes with breaks

Answering your question:
Find stuff she likes, do it together, use strong first principles but try to keep on playing. For example: my son really likes to be better at pull ups. So we do strong first like progressions, but it‘s a game. He loves to get better.
Your daughter is 14, so she can definitely start using some weight.
If you don‘t have kettlebells at home, buy 1-2 of them (and a TRX, rings), start her doing swings. Combine this with crawls, push ups, jump squats, get ups.

 

[guardian7]

Hmmmm most 14yo who "lack strength" need activity, not training. For some of us going to a gym in our teens has been the beginning of a lifelong passion but for others it's a complete turn off. Dance, gymnastics, sports, yoga, pilates etc are all perfectly valid ways to be strong - it's called getting fit. I would encourage you to think a bit more broadly about the goal and explore with her all the options to achieve it

I live in a very large city in Asia where the environment is quite different and I already pay a lot for extracurriculars. School sports for girls are much less common and public facilities and green space is lacking. She did take swimming lessons before but that was not cheap. She actually does need strength due to the hospitalization I mentioned combined with covid and the lifestyle for students here.

Looking for gym training advice. It is paid for and happening.

 

[guardian7]

Not sure if others will think if it's related or not, but this article comes to mind - When StrongFirst Meets Circus: How Plan Strong Helped Us Win Silver in Moscow | StrongFirst

Shows how Strongfirst principles apply to more than just traditional strength training. It probably doesn't "help you" for your specific issue re programming, but might encourage you to think about other options in a different light.

Training family is hard. I've struggled immensely with it, and usually end up putting my wife off doing it with my over eagerness. Good luck mate

Thanks, yeah, it has been a struggle. Totally cliche. Family is totally supportive of my workouts but somehow they don't see how it would benefit them or willing to take that step until now.

 

[guardian7]

Not sure if others will think if it's related or not, but this article comes to mind - When StrongFirst Meets Circus: How Plan Strong Helped Us Win Silver in Moscow | StrongFirst

Shows how Strongfirst principles apply to more than just traditional strength training. It probably doesn't "help you" for your specific issue re programming, but might encourage you to think about other options in a different light.

Training family is hard. I've struggled immensely with it, and usually end up putting my wife off doing it with my over eagerness. Good luck mate

I might take a more skills approach like L-sit progressions after thinking about that article.

 

[guardian7]

I don‘t have a solution or program for you, but I would like to share my experience training with kids.

I train with my son who is 7 years old and last summer I trained a boy from the neighborhood who was then 15.

What I do/did with the boys is/was mostly circle training, a high variety of movements mixed with balance drills. I think you don‘t have to bring her to the gym if she doesn‘t really want this. I try to lead by example and I can do this because of I train at home. Whenever I start to train I ask my son if he wants to join me. If not, okey, if yes, great. The voluntariness is one of the most important fact for training with kids in my opinion. My son swims, trains Judo and is in our local gymnastics club (mostly playing games there). They play sports 3 times per week at school as well. So movement, training, playing is something he experiences every day. When we do our strength and conditioning training additionally we try to have fun.

I have a Torque M1 sled and we start every training with pulling and pushing the sled for about 15 to 20 minutes. Between this we do push ups, plank holds or quick sprints (agility work). We keep on moving and vary the speed of the sledpulls/pushes. The final pushes are used for all out sprints with resistance. (During this time my daughter (4yo) sits on the sled and is encouraging us)
Then we do some strength work with bodyweight, TRX, on the floor. We do TRX rows, more push ups, planks, dead bugs, tibial raises, calf raises, standing on one leg, etc. All done in circuits. We keep on moving, joking around, trying to beat each other in planks, crawl through our garden. At this moment I still don‘t use kettlebells or any iron-weight at all. Sometimes we do hill sprints, I carry a kettlebell and he has to beat me. Most of the time children from the neighborhood join us. Those are my variety days. When I do my A+A/Q&D work, he can watch me or I give hime something else to do. But those sessions need my full focus and I mostly do them alone.

Yesterday we only had a short time window and he did:
- 15 minutes: 25m pull, 25m push, 7 push ups (while he did push ups I did my sled rounds)
- Pull ups: 1, 2, 1, 1, 1
- Tib raises: 15/2
- Standing on 1 leg: several times for about 30 sec
- TRX rows: 15/2
- Different planks for about 2 minutes with breaks

Answering your question:
Find stuff she likes, do it together, use strong first principles but try to keep on playing. For example: my son really likes to be better at pull ups. So we do strong first like progressions, but it‘s a game. He loves to get better.
Your daughter is 14, so she can definitely start using some weight.
If you don‘t have kettlebells at home, buy 1-2 of them (and a TRX, rings), start her doing swings. Combine this with crawls, push ups, jump squats, get ups.

I like the idea of the children following you around like the Pied Piper. Great.

Yeah, I just don't have the home or neighbourhood environment here for some of this but a decent gym. I like the recommendation of game like activity and variety. I will get her to plan it together.

 

[John K]

What kind of minimal three day a week program would you start with? Would you introduce machines for upper body strength?

I would focus on push-pull-hinge-squat and do something every training day. I'd also split push and pull into vertical/horizontal.

H. Push: Pushups, bench press (dumbbell or barbell)
H. Pull: Ring row or inverted row, gorilla row if you have kettlebells
V. Push: presses (kettlebell or dumbbell or barbell, but most likely standing)
V. Pull: pull-up negatives
Hinge: kettlebell deadlift building into swings, cleans, or barbell deadlifts; single leg deadlifts
Squat: goblet squats to build competency; maybe walking lunges

I love Iron Cardio, especially for learning, so having one day being an Iron Cardio day hits push-hinge-squat. The cheat clean is amazing at teaching people how to clean which sets up a great press. Add in some pull-up negatives and you have a solid training session.

Alternate that with a horizontal day. I'd stick with pushups and ring/inverted rows and work with finding a height that she can do reps at. Set it up in a circuit - e.g. pushups, single leg deadlift, rows, goblet squat, repeat.

 

[Boris Bachmann]

Yeah, this is a difficult situation. Take it slow. Don't do too much, too soon.

If I were you now (with the wisdom of many bad experiences), I would start by building her competence (and then confidence) in very few lifts (like 2 or 3) + some easy cardio that you can both laugh and talk while doing.

Competence precedes confidence which precedes (true) commitment. It's not an ironclad law, but it's a basic truth of education and coaching. Commitment Follows Competence

The broken link in my blog post is this clip of Bob freaking out (Do NOT be this guy - I do understand his frustration however...):

 

[babyhauler]

No matter what I do, or what example I set, my family's natural state is to be couch potatoes. I believe this is a contemporary societal plague due to human nature, whichis that 85-95% of humans feel most happy (fake happiness) wasting time on screens. Due to this I set our wifi router to shut off every night at 8PM and the kids can't use screens until 1 PM. I do not provide any devices or funds for them to buy apps, they have to buy their own. But it doesn't matter what I do as this is human nature, and my wife sets a horrible example, she is happy to spend all day and night wasting time on her screens with little exercise.

Anyway, what has had some success to get my kids moving is a local taekwondo school. My sons and daughter all greatly enjoy sparring. The key here is that it was my kids idea to go to the school, and they set their own schedule with the teacher. I make it a point not to care, I just give them rides to/from when they ask. They choose to go a few times a week, they set their own pace. I think if I showed that I care about them going to Taekwondo they would go less often. One of my sons earned his black belt there, my daughter has advanced a few belts.

I have also offered YMCA classes and activities, bought a membership so my kids could go to the nearby YMCA. They never went. Not even once. They wanted their screen time.

Another thing that has had some success at getting them moving at home is Nintendo Just Dance. My kids have occassional dance competitions. One of my daughters liked Nintendo Ringfit a little bit, completed many levels. Nintendo has a handful of other amusing fitness games, I use them about once a month for variety. Some are very corny and silly. I told my family the Nintendo is mine and no one is allowed to buy sit-on-couch games for it, so we only have fitness games. They use it a few times a month.

I have invited my kids to practice kettlebell training or do basic bodyweight training, skate, bike, hike or jog with me. I taught them that simply doing a few deadlifts a day will have tremendous benefits for their life. At least my wife adopted dead lifts, she does a few kettlebell deadlifts every day without being reminded. I read books to them about health and fitness, no response. I quote cancer stats to them: "40% of Americans will be diagnosed with cancer, and once diagnosed you have a 50% chance of dying of cancer". I find the cancer threat very motivating but my family members don't. When I'm out with my kids, I ask them what they think about the masses of adults my age 50-100+lbs overweight and barely able to move, they shrug their shoulders.

They also don't seem to care that I look 15 years younger than my age, have recently added about 10lbs of muscle (thanks to Strongfirst), am considered very athletic and agile for my age. They don't seem to care that I weigh less than most of the women in my community and have more muscle than most of the men. They don't care that I have fun going outside every day biking, skating, jogging etc. So I just do my stuff alone and rarely talk about it with family members anymore. Remember the guide above, that 85-95% of humans just want to spend their days consume nonsense digital content on a screen- that's all that the vast majority of humans wants out of life, globally. Be the minority.

If anyone figures out how to help kids want something other than screens, let me know. I have experimented with completely taking screens away- yes I can do that, but it doesn't change the fact that they want screens more than just about anything else. Taking screens away just seems to build resentment, has never led to them discovering other activities or exercising. I have tried giving them lots of enrichment- live concerts of all kinds of music, international trips, interesting family experiences, offered different forms of schooling. No matter what- they just want to go back to their screens. Often when I'm trying to provide them some enrichment, they will be bored and grumpy and just want to go back to their screens. On a cruise, the same teenage boy who earned his blackbelt didn't do any activites on the flowrider, waterslides, climbing wall etc- he just wanted to go back to his interior cabin and use his screen device- which by the way had no internet hooked up to it! He said he was reading a book- I didn't buy internet on the cruise. I went and did all the physical activities by myself! Similar experiences with my older daughter. Screens almost always win.

So I believe the key to physical activity for kids is for the kids to NOT want their screens. If anyone figures out how to encourage kids (and adults) to want something other than their screens, let me know.

 

[Boris Bachmann]

If anyone figures out how to help kids want something other than screens, let me know.

If it's an option, they'll want it. Don't let it be an option. Period. My phone is not a distraction when I work because I put it away - I can't let it be available or that's what I'll waste time on.

If I could redo parenthood, my kid would have almost zero "screen time" and certainly zero screen time staring at a tiny phone or tablet screen until mid-teens. Would it have stunted his academic or social growth? Maybe a little, but I doubt it.

It's an addictive habit. Creating replacement behaviors is a start, but not if they are additional behaviors instead of REPLACEMENTS. In the old (and largely forgotten) movie, "Skin Deep", a man with a sex addiction is told by his therapist "You can't really work on an alcoholic's underlying issues until they STOP DRINKING. They have to stop drinking first." I'm no therapist, but it makes sense and even though I suspect it's not 100% true all the time, it's probably largely true most of the time.

 

[guardian7]

I would focus on push-pull-hinge-squat and do something every training day. I'd also split push and pull into vertical/horizontal.

H. Push: Pushups, bench press (dumbbell or barbell)
H. Pull: Ring row or inverted row, gorilla row if you have kettlebells
V. Push: presses (kettlebell or dumbbell or barbell, but most likely standing)
V. Pull: pull-up negatives
Hinge: kettlebell deadlift building into swings, cleans, or barbell deadlifts; single leg deadlifts
Squat: goblet squats to build competency; maybe walking lunges

I love Iron Cardio, especially for learning, so having one day being an Iron Cardio day hits push-hinge-squat. The cheat clean is amazing at teaching people how to clean which sets up a great press. Add in some pull-up negatives and you have a solid training session.

Alternate that with a horizontal day. I'd stick with pushups and ring/inverted rows and work with finding a height that she can do reps at. Set it up in a circuit - e.g. pushups, single leg deadlift, rows, goblet squat, repeat.

Inverted row is a very good suggestion. I have done those myself but forgot them. I want to work on control of the total body in space before adding much load. How I would learn if I could have a do over.

 

[guardian7]

If it's an option, they'll want it. Don't let it be an option. Period. My phone is not a distraction when I work because I put it away - I can't let it be available or that's what I'll waste time on.

If I could redo parenthood, my kid would have almost zero "screen time" and certainly zero screen time staring at a tiny phone or tablet screen until mid-teens. Would it have stunted his academic or social growth? Maybe a little, but I doubt it.

It's an addictive habit. Creating replacement behaviors is a start, but not if they are additional behaviors instead of REPLACEMENTS. In the old (and largely forgotten) movie, "Skin Deep", a man with a sex addiction is told by his therapist "You can't really work on an alcoholic's underlying issues until they STOP DRINKING. They have to stop drinking first." I'm no therapist, but it makes sense and even though I suspect it's not 100% true all the time, it's probably largely true most of the time.

I agree. TikTok and Instagram are the center of young women's social universe these days. Very unhealthy and the stats show it. I wish I had been stricter earlier before these two apps blew up.

 

[guardian7]

Yeah, this is a difficult situation. Take it slow. Don't do too much, too soon.

If I were you now (with the wisdom of many bad experiences), I would start by building her competence (and then confidence) in very few lifts (like 2 or 3) + some easy cardio that you can both laugh and talk while doing.

Competence precedes confidence which precedes (true) commitment. It's not an ironclad law, but it's a basic truth of education and coaching. Commitment Follows Competence

The broken link in my blog post is this clip of Bob freaking out (Do NOT be this guy - I do understand his frustration however...):

Yeah, I am going to focus on easy wins. Build really gradually. Focus on the habit of exercise. Good advice. Worse thing I can do is make a program for me not her.

 

[John K]

Inverted row is a very good suggestion. I have done those myself but forgot them. I want to work on control of the total body in space before adding much load. How I would learn if I could have a do over.

100% with you, my main consideration at this stage for adding things like bench or gorilla row is that very often the beginner lacks the strength to do basic bodyweight moves. There are regressions, and if you're familiar with them you do not need weights, but weights can be an option.

 

[guardian7]

No matter what I do, or what example I set, my family's natural state is to be couch potatoes. I believe this is a contemporary societal plague due to human nature, whichis that 85-95% of humans feel most happy (fake happiness) wasting time on screens. Due to this I set our wifi router to shut off every night at 8PM and the kids can't use screens until 1 PM. I do not provide any devices or funds for them to buy apps, they have to buy their own. But it doesn't matter what I do as this is human nature, and my wife sets a horrible example, she is happy to spend all day and night wasting time on her screens with little exercise.

Anyway, what has had some success to get my kids moving is a local taekwondo school. My sons and daughter all greatly enjoy sparring. The key here is that it was my kids idea to go to the school, and they set their own schedule with the teacher. I make it a point not to care, I just give them rides to/from when they ask. They choose to go a few times a week, they set their own pace. I think if I showed that I care about them going to Taekwondo they would go less often. One of my sons earned his black belt there, my daughter has advanced a few belts.

I have also offered YMCA classes and activities, bought a membership so my kids could go to the nearby YMCA. They never went. Not even once. They wanted their screen time.

Another thing that has had some success at getting them moving at home is Nintendo Just Dance. My kids have occassional dance competitions. One of my daughters liked Nintendo Ringfit a little bit, completed many levels. Nintendo has a handful of other amusing fitness games, I use them about once a month for variety. Some are very corny and silly. I told my family the Nintendo is mine and no one is allowed to buy sit-on-couch games for it, so we only have fitness games. They use it a few times a month.

I have invited my kids to practice kettlebell training or do basic bodyweight training, skate, bike, hike or jog with me. I taught them that simply doing a few deadlifts a day will have tremendous benefits for their life. At least my wife adopted dead lifts, she does a few kettlebell deadlifts every day without being reminded. I read books to them about health and fitness, no response. I quote cancer stats to them: "40% of Americans will be diagnosed with cancer, and once diagnosed you have a 50% chance of dying of cancer". I find the cancer threat very motivating but my family members don't. When I'm out with my kids, I ask them what they think about the masses of adults my age 50-100+lbs overweight and barely able to move, they shrug their shoulders.

They also don't seem to care that I look 15 years younger than my age, have recently added about 10lbs of muscle (thanks to Strongfirst), am considered very athletic and agile for my age. They don't seem to care that I weigh less than most of the women in my community and have more muscle than most of the men. They don't care that I have fun going outside every day biking, skating, jogging etc. So I just do my stuff alone and rarely talk about it with family members anymore. Remember the guide above, that 85-95% of humans just want to spend their days consume nonsense digital content on a screen- that's all that the vast majority of humans wants out of life, globally. Be the minority.

If anyone figures out how to help kids want something other than screens, let me know. I have experimented with completely taking screens away- yes I can do that, but it doesn't change the fact that they want screens more than just about anything else. Taking screens away just seems to build resentment, has never led to them discovering other activities or exercising. I have tried giving them lots of enrichment- live concerts of all kinds of music, international trips, interesting family experiences, offered different forms of schooling. No matter what- they just want to go back to their screens. Often when I'm trying to provide them some enrichment, they will be bored and grumpy and just want to go back to their screens. On a cruise, the same teenage boy who earned his blackbelt didn't do any activites on the flowrider, waterslides, climbing wall etc- he just wanted to go back to his interior cabin and use his screen device- which by the way had no internet hooked up to it! He said he was reading a book- I didn't buy internet on the cruise. I went and did all the physical activities by myself! Similar experiences with my older daughter. Screens almost always win.

So I believe the key to physical activity for kids is for the kids to NOT want their screens. If anyone figures out how to encourage kids (and adults) to want something other than their screens, let me know.

The best information I have read is to change the environment and create black and white rules to remove decision making. Clear times to stop or no phone use. No phone at the dinner table. No phone x amount of time before bed etc.