Erik,
I just wanted to chime in here to say, "you are not alone". Like you, I struggle with mental illness and, also like you, I have relied on the methods of StrongFirst (and the old RKC) to manage my mental health, as well as my physical health. I have been using Pavel's work for this function since 2004 and have always regretted deviating from this approach to chase newer, shinier approaches. As it happens, I am also a psychology researcher, and there are some very, very good theoretical models that help me to make sense of this phenomena. Suffice it to say, it is equally important that people in our position are Strong First psychologically, as well as physically, and the road to Strong is the same in both domains. Simplicity in life and programming, combined with just the right intensity and volume of stress at the right frequency is key to dominating my own everyday war with major depressive disorder and obsessive-compulsive disorder. And, yes - that is both a literal and metaphorical truth, in my experience. Just so you know: you may struggle with mental illness, but you are not crazy.
Also, speaking as a father, though I do not know you, I am immensely proud of you for fighting that war and still showing up as a father - and a single father, no less. I have boundless respect and admiration for your effort to do so. Too many of us - both depressives of either gender and modern men - give up on our responsibilities to our children, or merely phone them in. I know the majority do not, but my own father did this and I have watched many others follow suit, so I resolved long ago not to do so with my own children and to express to other fathers, when given the chance, how much respect I have for them. I know that, given the nature of the disorder, it may be hard to see how much good we are doing, but I hope you can glimpse it through the Darkness.
As Pavel has said many times, power to you!
- Owen